Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
