i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
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