I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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