Dual....:-)
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
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