his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
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