why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Randomize
