did you get engaged???
A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize
