His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
He kissed a someone with a penis
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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