I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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