I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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