I want to stick my p in your. b.
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
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