As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Randomize
