Your tits are I can't wait for
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Randomize
