Don't you send me to vm
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
