did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
OH MY GOD I AM DYING. AS I WAS TEXTING I JUST BUMPED INTO A MOTHER FUCKING DEER. I AM SHAKING
Wait...Literally? You hit a deer...with your body?!
I PHYSICALLY RAN INTO IT. I FELT ITS WEIRD HAIR AND I EVEN APOLOGIZED CAUSE IT DINDT REGISTER THAT IT WASNT A PERSON. MORTIFIED.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
