on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
i think im in europe. pls send help
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Randomize
