hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I touched a dick in church today
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