problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Randomize
