I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
Just took my morning after pill in the library
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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