I can't breathe out the right side of my face
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
Randomize
