i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
