I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Randomize