Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
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Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
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Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
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