Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
