Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Randomize
