I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
