its not stalking. its research.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
My liver is preforming stress tests.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize