he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
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The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Holy sore nipples Batman
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
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