I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
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She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brb crying the tears of my youth
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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