What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
