WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
A Guy Sent A Woman What May Be The Craziest Breakup Text Ever
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
28 Completely Safe For Work Pictures Of Genitals
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Your mankini haunted my dreams.