This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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