Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
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