I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize