clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
