My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
