??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
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