If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
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