i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
