I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
