I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Randomize