idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
