She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
As shirtless as possible
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
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