he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
