yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
