I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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