oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
