He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize