marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
