I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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